How to Live on the Edge by Sarah Lynn Scheerger

Author:Sarah Lynn Scheerger
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Cancer, Contemporary Realism, Daily Living, Disease, Family & Relationships, Family, Fiction-Young Adult, Fiction, Health, Illness, Injury, Mastectomy, Teens, young adult fiction
Publisher: Lerner Publishing Group
Published: 2019-12-31T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 21

When I wake again, I sense someone’s presence. My vision is fuzzy at first, and I blink hard, thinking it’s Axel. But as the room comes into haphazard focus, I see Micah’s shaggy curls.

My instinct is to shrink away from him, to hide myself and my stupidity. Even the slightest twist makes me feel like my ribs will snap in half. I start to turn my head, but my compressed brain scolds me, so I stay still. I’m so embarrassed that he’s seeing me this way.

“How ya doing?” He sets his hand on my arm, like that’ll somehow help me feel better. The meds are probably making me hallucinate, but the sensation of his skin on mine seems to send radiating heat up toward my chest.

“I’ve been better. What’re you doing here?”

“Saff called me. She thought someone should be with you, but she didn’t want to leave your cousins.”

Shame creeps into my skin, broiling my cheeks. It’s my fault. I convinced Axel to take the girls out with us so late, and I let him drive, knowing he might take a risk with the kids in the car.

“I feel shitty.” There’s something about being friends with someone since we were both in diapers—I can’t lie to him. I can’t even lie to myself in front of him.

“You look shitty too,” he jokes. I haven’t seen a mirror yet, and I feel a spark of panic, wondering if I’ve permanently disfigured my face. I touch my cheek. “Just kidding. You’re just a little bruised.” He smiles. I reach for the hand that he’d rested on my arm. “I’m sorry you feel shitty.”

“Yeah. Luke and Tee are going to hate me forever.”

He moves his hand off of my arm, but I don’t move mine. It feels good to hold on to something familiar. In a flash I’m back to being seven years old, holding his hand to cross the creek. The creek rocks wobbled, and we figured holding on to each other would decrease the chances of falling in.

“I think Luke is pretty shaken up, yeah. But nobody’s told Tee yet.” Micah sets my hand back on my bed sheets, and for a second I worry that without his touch connecting me to this earth, I might float away into the sky like a wayward helium balloon.

“How do you know?”

“Saff told me. Your boyfriend called her from the accident and she texted Luke. They decided not to tell your aunt right away. Everyone’s mostly okay, and there’s no reason to stress her out. She needs to focus on her recovery.”

“Mostly okay,” I repeat.

“Yeah, except for you. You’re cuckoo in the head, Cay.” Hearing him say this makes me want to shrivel up like those plastic shrinky-dink toaster toys. “Not wearing your seat belt? Come on. It’s not like we’re living in the sixties or something.”

I turn my head away. I don’t need to hear it anymore. “How’s the car?”

“Totaled. But I’ll take pity on you and give you a lift now and then.

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